I have stopped the physical therapy for my feet- I haven't really been wearing the orthotics. I have been walking in my MBT's. All is as it once was before midlife crisis began. Strangely enough, the feet are feeling a bit better. Maybe I was just treating them too old. Maybe the weight of the world is less heavy. I don't miss cute podiatrist and I'm not sure I will go back. I DID like the foot massages but luckily I have a husband who is always happy to oblige. Lucky lucky me.
I'd like to really start walking again- maybe even do a pathetic jog that kind of looks like walking but is really a jog that really aught to just be a walk. I should probably get some new running shoes- maybe even get fitted at the New balance store for them. Oh that sounds ULTRA fancy. Will I actually go and get MY feet fitted for a new pair of shoes. Probably not. I still haven't gotten a new pumice stone.
Both Sam and I have narrow feet so, yes, our children also have narrow feet. Gone are the days of happily buying $14 shoes at Target. Lulu has been wearing a pair of size 11 shoes for the past while. She likes them because they stay on her feet. This would be great if her feet was actually a size 11. They are 12.5. She has been complaining of hip pain and has gotten out of PE class at school complaining that her feet hurt. I have tried to get her to wear bigger shoes but she has refused and anyone that knows Lulu knows how hard it can be to make her do anything she doesn't want to do. I broke down and took her to the expensive shoe store where they basically have a pediatric podiatrist fit them for shoes. ONE HUNDRED AND SEVENTY ONE dollars is what I spent today. And Lulu was SUCH a brat. Here I am in the shoe store as Lulu is being presented beautiful shoe after beautiful shoe that will make her tiny little feet happy. She is scoffing and turning her nose up and all I can think is "What the Fuck? I wish someone would take ME out of their way and get me some happy feet shoes." and Yes I AM available if anyone should feel the urge to...
I am so acutely aware of the pain that my kids could have. I don't want them to have plantar fasciatis or get weird pains here and there. They are little! They shouldn't have midlife crisis pain. So each kid got 2 pairs of shoes- Some sparkly grey ones and some suede pink ones for Lulu- some grey sandals and obnoxious lite up sneaks for Oliver. And what did I get? An earful from Lulu and over sized balloons thrown at my head as I sped down the 405 freeway. Life is dreamy and my kids feet will be healthy, happy and hoppy. Trying to be zen. Trying to be zen.
I really HAVE been looking for my marbles....I wrote a while back about trying to be a better mom. I suppose getting shoes that fit is a great start. But I am really trying not to let their little "things" make me mad. Lulu was being embarrassingly snotty and princess like and I didn't freak out on her. I apologized for her behavior to the guy at the store. He was SUCH a gentleman about it. He must deal with a ton of little fuckers everyday. In the car I told her she was disrespectful and that wasn't OK to speak to grownups, or anyone like that. Probably went over her head but in my mind I feel like she really heard me and learnt something. HA... no, but really.
But it was a good day. I spent the whole day with the kids and I think I was really present. This is the first time I have been on the computer today- Saw seals this morning as I walked around the sun drenched marina with Oliver while Lulu did her karate class. I thought to myself that life is pretty good. The east coast is freezing and here I am in a t shirt holding a nice little warm hand and listening to the excited little questions of my littlest beloved as the seals give each other kisses. He is wearing new shoes. I am not. and yet it was all good. We went to the park, I had meaningful conversations with other moms, we went for lunch, saw a bad kid's movie. It was a real Saturday (as opposed to a fake Saturday where I ignore the kids and they watch TV. but actually that kind of Saturday sounds kinda good too.) They were exhausted and went right to sleep. I am exhausted too and my feet don't hurt.
Ya know. I think I have found a marble or two.
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